The magic of “no” in a negotiation

The magic of “no” in a negotiation

The magic of “no” in a negotiation

Good negotiators all the time give attention to the right way to get the opposite aspect to say “sure”. This has confirmed to be an efficient method as a result of it shifts the main focus from “what I need” to “what do they want for me to just accept them?” Which means most of your effort is spent making an attempt to keep away from them saying “no.”

Nice negotiators, nonetheless, transcend that. Relatively than making an attempt to keep away from the “no”, they work with him to maneuver the method ahead. Certainly, in a negotiation, folks discover it simpler to say “no” than “sure”. Chris Voss, who spent 25 years because the FBI’s chief hostage negotiator, shared his experiences in his current guide, By no means cut up the distinction – Commerce like your life will depend on it. In a number of the most tough negotiations with a number of the most harmful negotiating events, he has had far more success with the “no” than with the “sure”. Even when we do not negotiate with criminals and terrorists (hopefully!), we are able to nonetheless study rather a lot from Chris’ strategies.

In any negotiation, it’s simpler to say “no” than “sure”. “No” is a protecting phrase – defending them from what they do not need. “Sure” is a phrase of dedication, and the second we are saying it, we fear about what we now have dedicated to. It will get worse the extra we are saying “sure”. At the back of your thoughts is that warning voice asking, “What are you getting your self into right here?”

So if saying “no” is less complicated for the opposite social gathering, why not use it? Can we alter our questions in order that by saying “no” we get the end result we wish? The reply is a convincing sure!”. Listed below are some examples:

  1. As an alternative of asking, “Is that this a very good time to speak?”

Strive: “Is that this a nasty time to speak?”

  1. As an alternative of asking, “Do you assume we are able to come to an settlement right here?”

Strive: “Do you see something stopping us from reaching an settlement right here?

  1. As an alternative of asking, “Are you able to assist me?”

Strive: “Is there something stopping you from serving to me?”

The precept in a nutshell is: are you able to reframe your query so {that a} “no” reply will transfer the method ahead. This method is a sport changer. I have been making use of it for some time in many various environments and it really works!


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